6/29/14
Yesterday was a roller coaster ride. Happy, cause I got the
chance to put a smile on your face, I had the chance to hug you and to make you
laugh and text with you for an approximate time of 38 minutes. I had the chance
to be close to you again though it was just short-lived. Everything with you,
it seems, is short lived. The summer conversations, the hugs (two hugs to be
exact), the holding hands, and the way you held on so tight, the happiness
brought by those things… they’re all so short-lived.
Here I am again… thinking of
ways to get your attention for you to at least see me. Like, literally see me.
It’s so hard to not think about you because my mind is brimming with thoughts
of you. It gets annoying sometimes ‘cause thinking about you is exhausting. I’d
get so giddy and happy first, like my stomach will be filled with butterflies
and I’d look up at the ceiling and realize that I am already smiling like a
crazy ass Nicholas Sparks character then like all Nicholas Sparks stories,
something bad happens. I’ll finally realize that you are, in a way, a hopeless
case. Sure, you like me like you told me. Sure, you saw me in a slightly
different way. Sure, your smile is enough to make my day. But the fact still
remains… You are not sure enough.
And truth be told, that hesitance,
that uncertainty is enough to break my heart.
